Tomorrow morning I report to George Washington University Hospital for surgery. My doctor assures me the matter is quite straightforward and soon I will be free from a pain in my foot that has troubled me for years. I have no fear of the actual procedure or subsequent discomfort. I am confident in my ability to bounce back quickly and particularly enthusiastic about being able to return to my teaching, toddler-chasing, and personal yoga practice pain-free!
But the timeline for recovery is not clear...and this uncertainty is testing my limits. Will I be able to teach within a matter of days or weeks? Can I return to running next week or next month? Everyone's threshold is different... my sage doctor advised.
The guidance to proceed with caution and listen to my body resonates with my inner yogini, but the rest of me wants a timeline. I want to know. Today. Exactly when I can resume each of the activities that provide structure to my life.
But such certainty isn't possible, and this inner struggle is a reminder of the futility of wishing for things to be other than they are. Life will unfold according to a plan much bigger and more beautiful than anything I could devise. My work is to stop clinging to the mirage of control and step out of the way.
I have encountered this lesson many times - as a mother, a teacher, a wife, a daughter, and a friend. But it is here again - and will continue to return - until I master it. What teachers are you encountering today? Can you listen and learn the lessons they bring?
Thank you for visiting the Starting Over blog. Stop by anytime for a dose of inspiration, tools to help you achieve your goals, and a community of fellow travelers. I hope to see you often!