Saturday morning I woke up sick. And not just any run of the mill sniffly, sore throat, change of seasons sick. This was a vice grip on the head, pins and needles in every extremity, burning hot then freezing cold, zero appetite, blurred vision and shaky hands kind of sick...
As those of you who know me can attest: I. DON'T. GET. SICK. And those of you who know me VERY well can confirm that if I were (hypothetically, of course) to feel less than 100 percent I certainly wouldn't admit it. Mind over matter, right?!?
So I dragged myself out of bed, somehow assembled breakfast for the babe (though I have no recollection of what it was...), and staggered through a floor puzzle, willing myself to snap out of it. I consumed cup after cup of herbal tea doing my best to flush away the unwelcome intrusion into my weekend plans. Come on Angelyn - it is going to be beautiful out there today! The babe is excited about the Easter Egg hunt at the park! The Elite Eight starts tonight! You were planning to run to the Tidal Basin to see the Cherry Blossoms! Don't ruin this fantastic weekend!
But less than two hours later I realized I had no choice but to surrender. As bad as the physical discomfort in the moment was the psychological distress of turning to my husband to admit, "I need to go back to bed..." But I did. And every time I woke up throughout the day convinced I could "power through," I ended up right back where I started.
The initial moment of surrender was uncomfortable, but it opened up channels of support that proved incredibly therapeutic. I was heartened by the kindness of a fellow teacher who inconvenienced herself to come to my rescue by teaching my afternoon class. I was warmed (quite literally) by the homemade chicken noodle soup my husband and daughter prepared. I was healed by the 16 hours of sleep I was able to experience.
Often we need to surrender something - whether our pride, our plans, or our vision of how things "should" unfold - in order to receive what we really need. What do you need to surrender to be your best self today?