In the recent Trailblazers interview with Gregory Lennon, he referenced the Sufi tradition of the four gates of speech. While I have written previously about my determination to say the wrong thing more often, some things are still better left unsaid.
The four gates offer an excellent way to evaluate how - and whether - we should speak in a given situation. At the first gate, we ask ourselves, "Are these words true?" At the second gate we ask, "Are they necessary?" At the third gate we ask, "Are they beneficial?" At the fourth gate, we ask, "Are they kind?" If the answer to any question is no, we leave the words unsaid.
The next time you find yourself faced with a challenging conversation, can you apply this simple test? How might it change the way you interact?